The Motion Picture Business
by Jet556
Summary: AU set in 1939. Lee Ping is an actor in westerns, Tina Kwee is an actress in B movies. Lee's leading lady is always Brandy Silver, Tina's leading man is always Brad Von Chilstein. Lee loves Tina, Tina loves Lee, Brandy believes she loves Lee and that he loves her but she really loves Camillio who has been pining for her from afar, Brad believes he loves Tina and that she loves him.
1. Chapter 1

**Welcome. Another AU from me since I'll wait until Season 3 starts in Canada before I start writing non-Au fan fiction. Enjoy.**

**A. Nigma Studios**

It was the fall of 1939. America was making it big in the motion picture business with films like "The Wizard of Oz", "Mr. Smith Goes to Washington", "Stagecoach" and "Wuthering Heights." In the shadow of American films one British film called "Goodbye, Mr. Chips" had made it big and in the shadow that one specific British film… films from other countries: India, Turkey, Italy but most specifically Canada.

A. Nigma studios had been founded in 1926 by Alexander Nigma. Four years later, Nigma died. He had been terminally ill with throat cancer from heavy smoking and having some fake snow on the set of one of his company's films. Nigma was succeeded by R. Wurst, who suffered from a mental breakdown six years later, and was himself succeeded by Wendell Barrage. Barrage was a former war veteran who had suffered major injuries in World War I. This resulted in him looking… very intimidating.

The studio made westerns, film serials and B movies with plenty of mystery and action. The westerns had made stars out of Lee Ping and Brandy Silver. Lee was a former stunt man, Brandy just an actress and script writer. They were always cast as love interests and Brandy had become convinced that she and Lee were in love. Over on at the B movies, the same thing had happened with Brad Von Chilstein and Tina Kwee, only in reverse! Brad had convinced himself that he and Tina were in love. Brad was the son of silent film actor Ace Von Chilstein, and became an actor to continue the family legacy no matter how delusional he became. Tina had been a script girl but had since become script writer and actress when Brad saw her.

As for the serials they had actors such as Camilio Martinez, Biffy Goldtsein, Chaz Moneranian and the extremely unlucky Basil Hagen. Why was Basil so unlucky? Well, he was the inventor of Theater-in-the-Square where no one got a good seat! Theater-in-the-Round wouldn't be invented for another eight years so people would keep reminding Basil of his failure until then. But enough of his failures when it comes to inventing ways for the stage! What everyone talked about was him ticking off Cheeta the Chimpanzee at MGM so much that the beast tried to rip his arm off! That's what all of his co-workers talked about! Basil the Failure aside, Camilio Martinez or simply Cam as he preferred to be called would always end up playing monsters that showed up in the serials. Cam had an interest in politics and was only going to be working at A. Nigma studios until he had found a way to become the first black politician in a white politic world. As for Biffy, he had been a gangster but had since become an actor and costume designer.

Also working at the studio was Holger Holgaart, a dance choreographer, Lynch Webber, a film crewmember, Ed McFeeney, the head of the music department, and Veronica Victoria, a female director. There were many other people but not many were credited.

Over in the western department, the movie "Showdown" was being filmed. Lee was a cowboy Brandy was a dancehall queen the two loved each other… Lee wanted to kill himself. One more movie as Brandy's leading man and he'd probably go insane. It was like eating the same thing day after day after day or being in prison! This was a fate worse than death!

Lee looked at the guns in his holsters. If only the bullets weren't rubber.

Over at the B movie department where the film "The Lion Man" was being filmed, Tina was going through something similar. Always being the leading lady to a delusional nut job of an idiot was tiring. It felt like her life was being sucked out of her. Brad might as well have been a vampire. If he were then Tina could have just drove a stake through his heart, cut off his head and then fill his mouth with garlic.

At the serial department, all of the actors were taking a breaking from filing the third episode of "Speed Crabbe." The actors who had no love for Brad had taken one of his pictures and started throwing darts at it.

"Brad is such a jerk!" Cam threw his dart at Brad's picture. It hit Brad's nose. Cam was in a gorilla suit but at least had taken the mask off. The sight of a gorilla playing darts would cause someone who had just walked in to wonder if they were hallucinating.

"He's not just a jerk, he's Nazi party material!" Basil, dressed as the serial's villain, threw his dart only for it to miss and hit Chaz in the rear. Chaz, who was the hero 'Speed Crabbe' turned around and threw the dart at Basil, which missed Basil and hit Veronica Victoria's chair. Basil just stood there smiling, his costume looking one third Fu Manchu based, one third Devil based and one third military dictator based.

Chaz's misfortune caused laughing from all present. Biffy gave Basil a pat on the back, which caused Basil to fall down. "Basil, you just keep missing and you just keep hitting something that isn't the target!" Bifyf's teasing was playful and had a point. He had once been hit by a pie from Basil that had been meant for someone else. It caused Biffy to wonder if Basil would miss a target if it were one foot away from him. "So, we know Lee likes Tina and Tina likes Lee so how about we get them-"

"Oh, ar son De!" Basil threw a dart violently. It didn't hit the picture of Brad but it did end up breaking a prop ray gun. Cam gave Basil a look that clearly said "But it was my turn!" Basil started to storm off only to turn around. "Lee and Tina, Lee and Tina, Lee and Tina! That's all you three ever talk about! Getting those two lovebirds together! What about me?"

"What about you?" Cam brought up a good question. What about Basil? What did he have to be angsty about?

"I don't know but I'll think of something!" And with that Basil left to do something.


	2. Chapter 2

**Welcome. Enjoy.**

**Showdown**

Basil walked over to the set of "Showdown." He had changed into his clothes and was just visiting the set of one of the westerns. Lee was in costume: hat, jacket and all. As for Brandy she was dressed as a… well, she was a… she was costumed as something of low respect.

Lee was in a scene with a gunfight. If you've seen one western starring Lee Ping and Brandy Silver then you've seen them all. What was Brandy doing? She was standing there looking frightened. This was it. A bunch of nonsense, gunfight Lee and Brandy kiss.

The scene ended and then it was time for a break. Lee walked over to Basil and threw the guns at him. Basil just looked at the guns hoping he could have such fun roles!

"Basil, I can't take much more of this! I wanted to be an actor like Fred Astaire instead I'm probably going to be trapped doing westerns until the day I die!" Basil rolled eyes. Lee wanted to be like Fred Astaire, Cam wanted to be like Clark Gable, Biffy wanted to be like James Cagney, Tina wanted to be like Katharine Hepburn what about him? Who did he want to be like? He wasn't sure. "The worst part of this job is when I have to kiss Brandy. I'd rather kiss a tarantula!"

"If I were you I'd choose a cobra." Basil then looked over at Brandy. "But I'd just love to know what its like to be kissed by a girl. I'm always playing the villain of the serials, the guys I play pretty girls don't write to!"

"Maybe you'd be better off with Dick's job." Lee looked over at Dick Andrews. He always ended up playing the guy that Lee killed in the climax.

Basil just nodded. "At least he gets to kiss girls!" He then started to take a sip of water.

"So can you give Tina a message?" Basil once again rolled his eyes. Why did he have to be the messenger? The messenger always got shot and Brad would probably use that knife Zantar the Lion Man used to kill him! Finally, he nodded and started to take a large sip of water. "Okay, tell her to meet me at the Wurst Café for our date." And then Basil spat out the water in his mouth in surprise. The water ended up hitting Brandy just as she walked over.

What did Brandy do? She ended up angrily hitting Basil with a parasol. This went on for about ten minutes. Even if Basil retreated still Brandy was there to beat him with the parasol! She just kept following him. All across the lot of A. Nigma Studios, Basil fled and ever Brandy was there!

Once the beating was over, Basil returned to Lee. He was absolutely surprised. Lee and Tina were dating? When did this start happening? Biffy was planning to get Lee and Tina together and they were already dating?

"Let me get this straight…" Basil held up a finger. "You and Tina… are dating…" Lee nodded. "Does Brandy know about this?"

"No, Basil. Brandy does not know about this."

"Does Tina know about this?" Basil's question just caused Lee to raise an eyebrow. Basil then nodded in understanding. "Right, stupid question."

"Basil, just go and give Tina the message. What's Brad gonna do? Put a bomb in your car?" Basil sighed and then left the set of "Showdown." Better to get it done.

As soon as Basil left, Brandy walked over to Lee. And now came the moment Lee always dreaded. Brandy's delusions of their love on the screen being a reality was what made spending time with her agony for Lee.

"Did I hear you talking about another woman? That woman?"

"Leave me alone you rattlesnake!" Ah, love. The false love of the screen, not the true love of reality. There was no love between Lee and Brandy. Lee loved Tina. Brandy believed that Lee loved her. This would make things complicated.

"Lee, I love you! You love me! Everyone knows it!"

Lee stared in disbelief. "Have you been reading those fan magazines again?

"Of course!" That answered so much! That talk in the fan magazines of them being engaged was complete nonsense! Lee and Brandy weren't engaged! Lee would never marry Brandy!

He walked away from the set. He had to talk to Barrage about this co-star thing. He could not keep having Brandy as a co-star!


	3. Chapter 3

**Welcome back everyone. Basil is supposed to have a big roll for the first six chapters then be gone for the majority of the story. Enjoy and review.**

**Not Okay**

As Basil walked into the b-movie area, a chimpanzee walked up to him. This just wasn't any chimpanzee. This was Blompkins, the chimpanzee who played the Lion Man's sidekick Jiggs. Any fool could see that "The Lion Man" was a thinly veiled knock off of MGM's Tarzan films, which themselves paled in comparison to the greatness that was the original Tarzan novels by Edgar Rice Burroughs. Even the Lion Man's name "Zantar" was just a reverse of the name "Tarzan" in fact it was one of two names that Burroughs had considered before choosing the name "Tarzan" so whoever wrote the script for this movie must have known Burroughs well. Even the story of a man raised by lions came from one of Burroughs novels: "Tarzan and the Lion Man." The plot of that was a film crew being in the jungles of Africa to film a movie only for Tarzan having to protect them from a mad scientist and his talking gorillas. That book was essentially a satire of Hollywood's treatment of Tarzan and it allowed Burroughs to spoof his own work and was the closest thing Burroughs ever got to writing a purely comedic novel despite still having all the action and adventure. As a Burroughs fan, Basil did not like the Weissmuller Tarzan films anymore than Burroughs or any other purist did. One thing that Basil wondered was just how much a lawsuit this plagiarism would make!

Basil had little love for Blompkins in fact he had little love for chimpanzees in general. He knew these things to be vicious cannibals and having been present when Blompkins predecessor, Emmett, ripped Barrage's arm off didn't help matters anymore. Barrage had been saved from certain death but Emmett had been put down for being considered too dangerous. Basil couldn't help but wonder in Blompkins was about to do something particularly vicious.

What did Basil do?

He grabbed a prop rifle and pointed it at Blompkins. "Back! Back! Back, I say you hairy, cannibalistic dwarf!" He motioned with the rifle a few times until he had backed Blompkins into a cage. As he went to close the cage and trap the chimp, Blompkins punched Basil right in the left eye.

Foolishly, Basil tried to punch Blompkins but only ended up getting his right hand bitten. The pain was horrible! Basil then wrenched open the chimp's jaws closed the cage and then locked it.

Well, that was that. Blompkins wouldn't be causing any trouble for a bit.

Basil then asked around to see if anyone knew where Tina was. He was directed to her dressing room and it was only when he reached the door of Tina's dressing room that he noticed something specific. Brad was nowhere to be seen! This only worried Basil. If Brad truly did believe that he and Tina were in love like the characters they played in the B movies then who knew what he'd do!

Basil opened the door and out fell Brad, Tina having sidestepped him, and kissing Basil's jacket. Basil was less than impressed. He had always dreamed of getting Brad fired but he could never find a way now he had one!

"Basil, thank goodness! For a moment I thought you were someone else." Brad was going to sweet talk Basil. Unbelievable! He was going to sweet talk someone who hated him more than fascism itself. "I'd just like to say that you should knock before entering a room that has two people in love trying to have some alone time."

Basil did not look convinced. If he knew anything it was that Tina did not love Brad. Tina herself did not even like being in the same place as someone as dangerously delusional as Brad Von Chilstein.

"Basil, could you please accompany me to Barrage's office?" Tina walked past Brad. She was clearly going to take this up with the head of the studio. It only caused Basil to wish that for once someone would notice that he was in pain.

Lee hadn't noticed that Basil was in pain from Brandy hitting him repeatedly with a parasol and now Tina didn't seem to notice that he was in pain from Blompkins savagery!

Still Basil walked with Tina. He loved her, not romantically, but as if she was his sister. He wasn't too thrilled about what Brad had been trying to do to her. A blind person could have told what was going on!

"So, Tina, was Brad really trying to…"

"Yes, Basil, he was."

They walked in silence. Basil would have to tell Tina about where to meet Lee for their date after they had talked to Barrage. Just made him wish that things wouldn't be so dramatic around here! It was starting to seem like his life was turning into a drama!


	4. Chapter 4

**Welcome back everyone. I really just wanted to get Basil out of the way earlier than intended. Enjoy and review.**

**Aftermath**

When Basil and Tina went to Barrage the result of the complaint was Brad being fired from A. Nigma Studios. Brad wasn't happy about being fired. With his ego he had come to think himself the face of the studio. He should have gotten himself a lawyer.

Brad did not go quietly. He had nearly strangled poor Basil to death, claiming that Basil would get what he deserved and that Tina would end up with him. Brad had to be carried out.

After all that, filming of "The Lion Man" was cancelled and Tina was transferred over to the western department. Wouldn't that make things complicated? Lee and Tina were in love while Brandy believed her and Lee to be in love.

Tina would start over in the westerns the next day.

Basil was able to give Tina Lee's message. Tina thanked Basil with a kiss on the cheek. That was all Basil ever got from a girl, just a kiss on the cheek. It was like he had a fungus on his lips!

Then Basil and Tina parted ways.

Basil was terrified. What was Brad going to do to him? And how?

He got blown up by a car bomb! So died Basil Hagen… Maybe. He was rushed to a hospital but there was no word on if he was alive or not… Not that anyone was aware of what happened except for Holger Holgaart, the dance instructor.

Not that it helped when Basil was blown up. Holger was so shocked he kept speaking in Viking land talk!

But now we must leave Basil, or better yet forget about him and the state he's in, as we move on to Lee and Tina's date. So what if Basil might be dead? It is his lot in life at the moment, time to move on to someone else.


	5. Chapter 5

**Welcome back everyone. I'm not really that good at writing dates to we'll just be skipping to the next day. Basil will not be appearing. Enjoy and review.**

**Writing an Epic**

Lee and Tina's date had been fantastic. As they spent time together the next day, Brandy was more than a little jealous. She was extremely jealous! Angry even! Her Lee spending time with that b-movie actress! It just wasn't right, it was not right at all!

It should be noted that the fan run magazines said that Lee and Brandy were engaged. They weren't, in fact Brandy had been reading the magazines and now did not just believe she and Lee were in love but were engaged. They weren't, yet Brandy believed they were. This would cause complications. This would cause many complications or at least it would have but it still could have.

Cam had been pining for Brandy from afar. Since Lee and Tina were together and Brandy would probably end up being like a raging volcano, it was best that Cam made his move and tried to calm Brandy.

Also it must be addressed that no had realized Basil was missing. Holger had forgotten all about Basil and there had been no word in any of the newspapers about his car exploding with him in it. What is the point of this? It just proves that no one would notice if anything bad were to happen to Basil Hagen.

Then Barrage called Tina down to his office. She came down but nervously. Was there going to be a lawsuit because of Brad getting fired? Was he suing the studio? If the studio lost would she be fired? She was the reason Brad had been fired because he had tried to 'violate' her. Actually Basil was probably in danger of losing his job too since he was the person who said Tina was telling the truth when they went to Barrage.

As Tina approached the door to Barrage's office she swallowed nervously. She reached out her hand and knocked on the office door.

"WHO IS IT?" Barrage really did not have an indoor voice.

"T-Tina Kwee."

"ENTER!" Tina entered. There Barrage was sitting at his desk. "SIT DOWN!" Tina actually wondered if Barrage was deaf and he kept shouting so he could hear himself. She doubted it but it was a possibility. 'YOU HAVE HEARD OF 'THE VOODOO TRADEGY?'"

"Uh, yes…" 'The Voodoo Tragedy' was an epic film that A. Nigma studios had been trying to produce since 1929. Why hadn't it been? The script kept being revised. The plot of the movie was that it was essentially 'Macbeth' set in nineteenth century Haiti and would have Georgian costuming. In the place of witchcraft would have been voodoo. It was intended to feature an all black cast and in most recent discussions. Of course the problem was that there wasn't enough black actors working for A. Nigma studios. In order from most to least of ethnicity of the actors it was: white, Asian, black. The consideration of blackface was unethical since the people working at A. Nigma studios considered it to be offensive but there was a possibility that they could avoid the offensive appearance of blackface. As for the script being revised it went through a number of writers, the latest had been Basil and the most he had done was change the Hecate equivalent from an old woman to a young man with a bull whip.

"YOU'RE UP TO BAT!"

Tina's jaw dropped. She was going to work on the script for 'The Voodoo Tragedy.' This was fantastic! She didn't know what to say? "Uh, thank you." Well, maybe she did kind know what to say.


	6. Chapter 6

**Welcome back everyone. Enjoy and review.**

**To Work**

After the day's work of filming, Tina sat at a typewriter after having read the script of "The Voodoo Tragedy." What was she going to do? First, she would cut down the eighteen characters to just eight. Of course this would have to mean getting rid of Basil's one contribution but there was too many characters to keep track of so gone would be the Hecate equivalent.

She was just so unsure of what do after that. As Tina stood up and walked around her apartment she suddenly started to wonder where Basil was. In the parking lot at the studio there was just a wrecked car that seemed to have dummy in it. Unless… No, it couldn't have been.

She turned back to the script. It would be easier for her to do some polishing off. The script wasn't half bad it would probably just end up being a two-hour film. Better shorten it to an hour and a half or people would either fall asleep or leave before it ended.

Instantly, Tina got to work. She finished a day later having only missed a bit of sleep. As she lay in bed to take a nap, there was suddenly knocking at her door. Sighing, Tina got out of bed and walked to the door of her apartment. She opened it and standing there was Brad!

Immediately, she slammed the door shut and locked it! Tina had to get a restraining order!

She then walked over to her telephone and started to dial Basil's number. He knew how to get rid of Brad.

Basil didn't answer. He must have not been home or… that had been him in the wrecked car.

Tina then dialed Lee's number. Lee knew how to get rid of Brad too so it wasn't that much of a change.

"Hello?" Tina smiled. Lee was home.

"Lee, its Tina. You're never going to guess who showed up at my door like an alligator for supper."

"Brad? I'll be right… Wait, isn't Basil the one people usually call when Brad is causing them trouble?" Basil and Brad had been enemies for years. It was only logical that people would get the person who knew how to get rid of Brad the easiest.

"I haven't seen him at all today and he didn't answer his phone." Tina was really beginning to suspect foul play. Basil ends up getting Brad fired because he tried to violate her and then he isn't seen at all the next day. Foul play? There was no question about it! "On the way here can you check that wrecked car in the studio parking lot?"

"Uh, sure." Lee hung up the phone. He'd be here soon.

Tina walked over to her door and then looked through her peephole. Brad was still there. All she had to do now was wait for Lee.


	7. Chapter 7

**Welcome back everyone. Enjoy and review.**

**Horribly Burned**

Eventually, Brad got bored and left. He'd be back and it would be better if Tina weren't around when he did.

When Lee knocked on the door, Tina was relieved to find Brad gone. So relieved she even hugged Lee!

"I have to admit, I had no idea what I was going to do if he was here. I'd probably have thrown Basil's body at him." What Lee said caused Tina to gasp. Lee would have thrown Basil's body at Brad?

"He's dead."

Lee gave a shrug. "Honestly, Tina, I have no idea. He looks so horrible I'm not sure if he's alive or dead."

Lee and Tina walked down to the parking lot. Lying on the backseat of Lee's car was a horribly burned thing. It was Basil. His face had gotten the worst of it. Tina wasn't even sure what she was looking at.

They then took Basil to the hospital. While the doctors looked at Basil, Lee and Tina waited. Both of them were wracked with guilt. They both suspected foul play and that the person behind it was Brad Von Chilstein himself! It wasn't that hard to figure out. Lee had asked Basil to deliver a message to Tina. Basil walked in on Brad trying to violate Tina. Basil and Tina had gotten Brad fired. Brad had swore Tina would be his and that Basil would be dead. It seemed Basil had gotten killed because of them. Tina would definitely be putting the gender swapped Hecate equivalent back into the script of "The Voodoo Tragedy."

Seconds passed. Then minutes. Then hours.

As it turned out, Basil had survived. He was lucky to have survived but he'd be wishing he hadn't for a few weeks. Basil was going in for some serious pain while he went through the healing process and he'd be covered in scars galore when it was done! For the moment however, Basil would be covered in bandages galore.

When Lee and Tina walked into Basil's hospital room, their guilt had gotten worse.


	8. Chapter 8

**Welcome back everyone. Basil returns to consciousness in this chapter. This chapter features some movie references. Enjoy and review.**

**Awakening**

So much noise! Couldn't anyone be…Wait… There were four voices… Lee, Tina, Cam and… No! Not her! Not Brandy!

Basil opened his eyes. He was in a hospital room. He wasn't sure why he was wishing he were in a coffin. Must have been the amount of pain he was in.

Brandy was angry. Something about Lee cheating on her with Tina… Lee and Brandy were never a couple and would never be a couple! Brandy was as delusional as that silent film actress… What was her name? Lamont! Lina Lamont! Brandy was acting like Lina Lamont! Believing her co-star loved her when he loved someone else. It was tragic but Lamont was a delusional person. So was Brandy!

And then Cam kissed Brandy.

Basil didn't know what was going on. Why was Cam kissing Brandy? Was he in love with her? Why? How? Why was Cam kissing Brandy? Why? Why? WHY?

Actually, Brandy looked to be as surprised as Basil was. Even Lee and Tina were surprised by this!

Basil groaned and sat up. No one was surprised to see Basil up. They had seen his eyes open, they just weren't sure if he was all there. For all they knew, Basil could have ended up with a serious head injury.

"What hit me? A train?" Basil put a hand on his face. His face was bandaged. Why was his face bandaged? "What happened? Why am I suddenly thinking of Karloff in 'The Mummy?'"

Tina swallowed nervously. "Uh, Basil, we think Brad put a bomb in your car." That was quite the thought!

Brad putting a bomb into Basil's car? Well, everyone saw it coming. They just didn't know when it would happen.

Basil lied back onto the hospital bed. "Brad finally got me! Oh, to die like this!" Basil wasn't dying. He had just turned into a large ham. "Lee, Tina… I left something for you in my will. I leave you my cottage out in the country!"

"Basil, you're perfectly-" Lee was interrupted by Cam running over to Basil's side.

"No! Basil, don't die! You'll get through this, mi amigo!"

Incredible. Basil had Cam wrapped around his finger. Apparently, Brandy too since she went running over to his other side. How did this happen?


	9. Chapter 9

**Welcome back everyone. Lets get on with the show! Enjoy.**

**Back to Work**

The next day, Basil was brought out of the hospital and put right back to work in the film serials. There was some objection, much actually. Barrage was quick to put people back to work and no one really cared that Basil had started working again, even though his face was covered in bandages.

"How does this happen?" Basil was sitting in the throne of Mang the Merciful, the villain of the Speed Crabbe. His face was still bandaged even though Victoria insisted that Basil remove them. Basil responded that it was doctor's orders they stay on for about a week. The solution? Never have Basil's face appear on camera. "After all I've been through don't I at least get the week off?"

Cam just rolled his eyes. "Week off nothing! You lied to Brandy and me! You weren't even dying!"

Basil made a gesture and stood up. He had to get out of here. "Was there at least anything about me in the papers?"

Cam sighed. Basil was really getting worked up about no one caring he had been hurt. "No, Basil."

Well, that was sad. Not even anything in the papers about Basil burned as if he had gone through the fires of hell and then gone through to purgatory in a coma and arrived in heaven still in pain through his whole ordeal in hell. Indeed Basil was still in pain and the news that there was nothing in the papers about him just indicated that very few people cared about him.

"Not even in the magazines?"

"It hasn't been that long, Basil."

Basil rolled his eyes. He had to get out of here.

Now that brings us to Barrage looking over Tina's rewrite of "The Voodoo Tragedy." He found it to be brilliant! All of it! Even the huge man with a bullwhip who served as the counterpart to Hecate! Tina was an absolute genius!

Clearly none of the previous scriptwriters would be getting any credit. That meant Basil wouldn't be getting any credit, neither would Brandy who had been Basil's predecessor when it came to rewriting the script.

This would not be a good year for crediting at A. Nigma Studios.


	10. Chapter 10

**Welcome back everyone. This is full of references to the various animated characters whom have been mistaken for being black when they really aren't. Example here? My OC Basil who is German-Irish yet inherited his mother's Greek-Italian skin tone. Enjoy and review.**

**Auditions**

Auditions came for "The Voodoo Tragedy." Among the people auditioning were those who were African-Canadian, Mexican-Canadian, Indian-Canadian, Arabian-Canadian, Spanish-Canadian, Pakistani-Canadian, Australian-Canadian, Native Canadian, Puerto Rican-Canadian, Greek-Canadian, Italian-Canadian and Hawaiian-Canadian. It was surprising how many ethnicities could be mistaken for the other. Actually, it was more bizarre than anything. There were some who were against the idea but if African-American actor Noble Johnson could play Native American, Latino and Arabian characters then why couldn't it work in reverse with other actors?

Who was doing the casting? Tina, Victoria and Lynch Webber.

First up was Camillio Martinez. He auditioned and ended up in the role of the Duncan equivalent. Someone young playing someone still young, but older. Duncan and thus the character based off of him was thirty-nine years old, Cam was fifteen years younger. Of course a little bit of makeup would make Cam look the proper age.

After Cam, both Chaz and Basil came crashing in. Cam wasn't even out of the room yet when those two came crashing in. Tina, Barrage, Victoria, Lynch, they all couldn't help but watch in complete bewilderment. They had both stolen Georgian era styled costumes from the costume department and swords from the prop department. This was beyond bizarre. The two had already started fighting.

"I learned fencing from Errol Flynn!" cried Chaz.

This only resulted in Basil responding with "Well, I learned fencing from Rathbone!" One Basil learning fencing from another Basil. How was that for irony?

No one stayed to watch the fight. They all left only to find Basil and Chaz still fighting when the came back. Chaz was tiring but Basil was still going strong! Basil didn't get a role but he did end up as fight choreographer. As for Chaz he ended up in the role of the Young Siward equivalent whose only point of existing was to get killed by the Macbeth equivalent.

Basil wasn't complaining. Neither was Tina, who considered that Chaz was less of a jerk than Brad but still a jerk. And considering that when she had been starting out, Chaz had been pretty sadistic. It was time for some sweet justice now.


	11. Chapter 11

**Welcome back everyone. Enjoy and review.**

**That Cheated Feeling**

It was decided that instead of having Biffy make all of the costumes, they would be rented from the Eastern Costume Company. Naturally, Biffy was less than happy. He was feeling cheated. After work, Biffy vented his anger at this. Where was he venting? Where else? At Basil's house!

Basil's house was an unlucky place. Whenever one of his co-workers were angry it would always be his home that his coworker would vent their anger. He really had to buy a new house and not tell any of his coworkers where it was.

"I've been working at the studio for six years! How can they do this to me? Haven't I always designed good costumes?"

"We only have seven hundred thousand dollars, can't waste it all on the payment of one person." Poor choice of words! Biffy ended up throwing a bookshelf at Basil that flew past him and instead hit the wall. "My cousin made that with his own hands!"

"Better reason, Basil! Give me a better reason!"

Basil's eyes started to dart around the room. A better reason… What better reason could there have been? Was there a better reason? There better have been otherwise he'd be losing more furniture.

"Uh, have you ever had a vacation? You've been working for six years, during any of those six years have you ever had a vacation? I don't recall ever seeing you not at work! You're just A. Nigma studios latest busybody aren't you? Take a break, have a life, fall in love! You have a better chance than I do! Look at me I'm even more ugly than the man in the moon now! No girl, no woman will ever love me… You have a chance, Biffy! Take it!"

The anger in Biffy's eyes over being cheated vanished. The tone of Basil's voice, the voice of a person who had given up on love spoke to him. Biffy smiled and put down the couch he was holding. Truth was the only thing in Basil's words. It was surprising what fear could do to a person.

"I guess you're right. A vacation could be nice." Biffy walked over to the pieces of the bookshelf Basil's cousin had made. He picked them up and walked towards the door. "Uh, I'll fix this while I'm on vacation." Basil held his head in his hands as he leaned against another bookshelf. "And Basil, don't give up on yourself." And with that, Biffy left Basil's house.

Don't give up on himself? How was Basil to do that? He had become the kind of person pretty girls didn't write to.


	12. Chapter 12

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**Twenty-Three Days Later**

"The Voodoo Tragedy" had been shot in twenty-three days. The last day had been devoted entirely to retakes. With sets leftover from the westerns and costumes rented from the Eastern Costume Company, A. Nigma Studios had made an epic film on a B-movie budget.

The studio had advertised the movie as being the perfect cross between "Wuthering Heights" and "Bride of Frankenstein" with its violent setting. This caused some worries for some who worked on the film.

"People are probably going to be expecting romance!" Tina was pacing around Basil's living room. This only caused Basil to wonder why things like this always happened at his house. He couldn't sit on his couch and eat a vine of grapes in peace could he? Then again this is what he got for inviting people over to his house for a little celebration.

"Comedy, horror and science-fiction too!" Lee's addition caused Basil to choke a bit. He had worked on the script same as Tina! So had Brandy! They had done bits of script work for the studio for a few years. Thankfully, there had been no word about who had done the script so Tina had little to worry about until the film was finally screened. Lee had done some work on the film as well as a crewmember, if he were to get credit or not was yet to be known. Anyone who couldn't pass as being of African descent had worked as a crewmember thus Lee and many others were a part of the film's crew.

"I hear that only Tina will be credited." Brandy's comment caused Basil to, once again, choke a bit. "If the movie is a failure then it will only affect her career."

"What?" Basil threw his grape vine in Cam's direction, which flew past Cam at Holger. Unfortunately, Holger was cleaning his glasses and the vine poked Holger in the eye.

"Me and Basil won't have to worry about our careers but you'll have to worry about yours!"

"My career?" Basil stood up and grabbed his jacket from the coat rack. Unfortunately, he ended up knocking the coat rack down in the process. "My career can't get any worse! I invented theatre in the square! Even if the movie fails I want it on my resume!" He then left his house. A few minutes passed and Basil came back in for his flat cap that Cam was holding. "Every time!" Basil left again and soon the sound of car hitting car was heard.


	13. Chapter 13

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**Coincidence is a funny thing**

Wouldn't one have known it that Basil had backed into Brad's car? Lee, Tina, Cam and Brandy wall stood there on Basil's porch staring in disbelief. Coincidence sure was a funny thing!

"What? How are you still alive?" If Brad's question didn't confirm Tina's beliefs that Brad had done something about Basil's previous car exploding then she didn't know what did. A question like that? There was no doubt about it! Brad was behind it. In fact everyone seemed to be convinced that Brad was behind the explosion that had gotten Basil.

"How am I still alive?" Basil took a dart out of his glove box and threw it at Brad. It hit him right in the middle of his right shoulder. For once, Basil actually did hit his target. "I've got nine more in the glove box you pompous, obnoxious, spoiled brat momma's boy of a baboon! I should have known that you were behind the explosion that caused my disfigurement." Actually, Basil had suspected Chaz. Brad had been his second guess. Strange considering how much they didn't like each other. One would have expected Brad to be Basil's first guess not his first.

"You throw anymore darts and I'll see you in the electric chair! No one throws darts at Brad Von Chilstein for free!"

"I've got plenty of money in my wallet if you want me to start paying!"

It was at this point that Cam sighed. Someone had better gotten the police to sort this out and it should have been him! He started to leave for the police station when Brad pulled out a gun. He then shot Basil in the head.

To everyone's surprise Basil didn't fall dead. He just stood there looking around. He had felt something hit him between the eyes and bounce off of him. In fact it had bounced off of Basil's face and somehow landed on Cam's shoulder.

It was a peanut, without a shell. Cam was as confused as Basil. Brad must have not been making that much money since he had been fired. Cam just continued on his way to the police station while Brandy walked into Basil's house and dialed his phone.

This all lead to a very uninteresting occasion. Basically, Brad had the wrong gun and ended up paying a fine. Very uninteresting.


	14. Chapter 14

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**Surprise!**

No one expected it to happen. No one expected "The Voodoo Tragedy" to be a success! Well, it was! It was even nominated for a few awards. Best actor, best actress, best special effects, best original score, best sound it was all very unexpected.

Of course this would mean no award for Tina, Brandy or even Basil although all three ended up being credited.

"First time I haven't been booed out of a theatre in three years!" commented Basil after attending the debut.

For best actor was Cam as Henri Christophe, the Macbeth equivalent since the previous actor had backed out. For best actress was Toni Williams as the Lady MacDuff equivalent. Naturally, these two were going to be at the award ceremony.

Tonight, a celebration was being held at A. Nigma studios. Barrage's office had six people in it, each of them raising a glass of success. There were Lee, Cam, Holger, Biffy, Tina and, of course, Barrage.

Barrage had gone on for ten minutes about planning their next success. Unfortunately, they wouldn't have a next success until after WWII.

It was at this point that the un-liked Dick Andrews burst into Barrage's office. Dick was an employee of MWF Pictures, a former employee of A. Nigma Pictures and the owner of a rather embarrassing nickname: Twinkieless Dick. As soon as Dick entered, Basil came running in with a spoon in hand. Apparently, Basil intended to cut Dicks heart out with that spoon. He didn't like Dick, didn't like Brad, didn't like Chaz and didn't like his former landlord Phil Blompkins.

"Hagen, wait outside… Without any thing in your hands." Barrage's instructions were not followed without a little bit of angry yelling. Basil really didn't like Dick. Biffy had to drag Basil out. "Alright, Andrews, why are you here?"

"As you know, MWF's new film 'Gangbuster' has been nominated for the same awards that your uninteresting Negro entertainment has." Dick's comment caused Cam to glare. He didn't really like Dick's racist attitude. "I'll just get to it right now, don't accept the awards if you do win. MWF has never not won an award, it would reflect badly on us. Also, I have a little bit of a message from Brad Von Chilstein…" At this point, Basil came bursting in with a sledgehammer. He never got near Dick because once again Biffy dragged him out of the office. Dick pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket. "I have no idea what it says, Brad has poor hand writing." Dick placed it on Barrage's desk. It went around the room until everyone had looked at it. They had no idea what it said.

What it actually said was "Basil, do you want to go bowling?" Unfortunately, it ended up in the trash.

Barrage ended up throwing a paperweight at Dick. Clearly, they would be accepting the awards if they won. Then Twinkieless left and everyone was back to celebrating.


	15. Chapter 15

**Welcome back everyone. This is it! Enjoy.**

**Our Ending**

The award ceremonies came and sure enough, it was a big deal. While Lee and Tina had decided to get married on that day, Cam was attending the ceremony with Brandy on his arm.

For Basil however it was pure torture. Lee and Tina getting married, Cam attending the award ceremony with Brandy on his arm… What about him? Was there no one for him?

He thought about this the whole way as he drove Cam and Brandy to the award ceremony. It just wasn't fair. Just for once Basil would like to know a girl's affection, a girl's kiss, he had never known a girl's love. Maybe Lee and Tina would buy a place with an apartment over the garage where he could grow old? He doubted it. There was no hope for him.

Basil pulled the car over and leaned over the steering wheel, tears coming from his eyes.

"Basil?" Cam leaned over and put a hand on Basil's shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"No!" Basil didn't even turn to look at Cam. "Nobody loves me!"

Brandy swallowed nervously. She had never seen Basil in this state, no one had. "Basil, you know I love you." Basil then turned to look at Brandy. "Like a brother, of course!"

Basil just turned back to the wheel and returned to his weeping. "Twinkieless Dick said I'd be better off chasing after horses than girls! That really hurt!"

Brandy gasped. "Is that true?"

Basil turned to once again to face Cam and Brandy. "Yes, it's true. Dick has no twinkie." Cam snickered like a schoolboy. There was something truly funny about what Basil had said.

As he finished snickering, Cam put a hand on Basil's shoulder. "Basil, have you just given up?" Basil nodded. "You haven't tried to meet anyone?" Basil nodded again. "What if I were to tell you that I have a friend named Cherie Burlyn who has a huge crush on you?"

Basil turned his head to look at Brandy. "Shouldn't you be the one saying that?" Brandy just shrugged, Basil looked at Cam. "I'd say bring me to her!"

"Alright then, buddy, lets go!"

Basil turned to the wheel, ready to go and meet Cherie Burlyn. He then turned back and looked at Cam and Brandy. He seemed to be doing a lot of that at the moment. "What about the award ceremony?"

Brandy shrugged. "If we win, we win. If we lose, we lose."

The German-Irish-Canadian nodded. "Okay, sound logic!"

And with that, the three didn't go to the award ceremony. "The Voodoo Tragedy" won the awards it had been nominated for even if those required to show up didn't.

As for the various people in this story, most of them left the motion picture business. Lee became a detective, Cam went into politics, Holger did something, Biffy did something, Tina became a reporter, Brandy opened a bakery and Basil? He returned to the stage where he became greatly respected. Chaz moved to India where he had a big fan base and continued with his acting career. Brad married a girl named Jenny Jerkins and they moved to Turkey where Brad had a big fan base. Dick himself also moved to a country where he had a big fan base: Italy. He later died during World War II. As for Chaz and Brad, they survived the war just like everyone else but they were ultimately forgotten in the west.

Lee, Tina and thire friends went on to have families and successful careers. Although they would never return to the film industry, they had fond memories of their days at A. Nigma studios, which sadly closed in 1948. The studio was torn down to make way for a complex of apartment buildings two years later.

The motion picture business was over for them. Did they care? Not really. They were fine to move on.

**The End**


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